Alcohol and drug use aside, I have changed a few things about myself and my routine that have helped me tremendously. Maybe they can help you, or someone else:

1. Cook for yourself. Find some simple recipes for wholesome meals (i.e. wholesome in the sense that it meets your nutritional requirements, and that you make it yourself most from scratch).
   • I tend to focus on lean meats, high protein, and green veggies.
2. Set aside one or two hours in your day for just yourself. Play video games, read a book, watch a movie, or take a walk. The idea is to scratch a personal itch you would otherwise deny yourself because of responsibilities or “lack of time”.
3. Naps. If you can, try to take a nap each day. Try to stay with 20-30 minutes, but recognize like any habit/hobby, it takes time to get it right.
   • I’ve gotten to the point where I’ll set a 30 minute timer and only actually nap for 20 minutes.
4. Meditation. I usually do this when I nap or go to sleep for the night. I have a pair of Bluetooth headphones that are in a headband (for sleeping), and I’ll cue up an hour long ASMR or guided sleep video. The guided sleep ones are real good because they teach you box breathing, and help keep your mind focused on yourself so it doesn’t wander into the things that keep you awake.
5. Develop a regular cleaning schedule. Not only will it keep your house clean and tidy, but it allows you to focus your energy into something productive and positive.
   • I use my Notes app to create my to-do lists, and check things off as they get done.
   • If I do something not on my list, I add it and immediately check it off; having a really long list checked off feels real good.
   • I don’t care if I get my list done in a day or week. It’ll get done.

CBD gummies for me, but yes, samsies. Cheers!

Can you blame people? We’ve had at minimum of 4 decades of Hollywood (over-)dramatization on what torture and espionage should look like. Who is to say that wasn’t done on purpose?

Maybe. What better form of protest than an insider leaking sensitive information?

All of our water is tied up by Nestle. _/s

Seizing land from white farmers in a continent where said white people are not indigenous is such a white thing to say.

Power to the South African government! 👊

~Feel free to use that fist however you see fit.~

Yeah, I’m not sure why you’re being downvoted. Everything you said is true, and respectful.

I think open-ended can be okay, so long as there are milestones we can achieve (i.e. try different things out to see what works and what doesn’t). Something as big as the environment, health/safety, and not completely alienating industries (as much as I hate to say it, we do need them and their resources to an extent), is not something that is going to be easily solved without compromise.

I expect that my last two points will not win me any popularity contests, but they cannot be ignored.

Gotta start somewhere, and gotta keep at it. It’s difficult at times, and there certainly are people who just want to see the world burn. But fuck them. They aren’t worth our time and energy.

Yes, but there are a few of us out there who want to see good things happen for all people.

For what it’s worth, it’s not anti anything to point out flaws. If anything, it’s being pro because it opens the door for a conversation; which, if both sides come at it in good faith, can lead to change.

Nothing will get better.

I still sometimes face the shelves because I’ve been there and I want to show solidarity.

Counseling is the way to go. It’s going to take a lot of time, a lot of opening up, and being honest with your counselor and yourself. Don’t expect to see results immediately. You will get frustrated with the process. But you have to keep going.

Also, don’t be afraid to find a new counselor if your current one isn’t working for you. And only you will know what that means. But when you find the right one, it will make a huge difference for you.

At the same time, you may need to give your therapist multiple chances. What I mean by that is that you will not always see eye to eye with them. And that’s okay; especially if they’re challenging you to move past something big. But if you constantly feel something is off, then trust your gut. This is about what’s best for you.

I genuinely wish you the very best of luck.

Aren’t all johnsons one eyed?

Wasn’t this an episode of Dexter?

Relatable.

That was me two years ago (and some change) when I was still married. My ex wife was the one to pull the trigger, and it was the best thing she could have done for the both of us (and our kids).

I was mad at her for a while. It was also terrifying having to move out and start over by myself, with no friends, and being a single father every other week. But I am sitting here in my house, hanging out after coming home from the gym, and simply enjoying the quiet time I have.

Yeah, I do miss having a relationship. It would be nice if I had friends too (I lost those in the divorce). But, it’s also nice to not have anybody but myself to answer to sometimes. And if I don’t do the dishes or take out the trash, there’s nobody there to give me attitude about it; it still gets done, but on my schedule and my terms.

All of that to say that if you’re genuinely not happy, and you feel there is nothing left to fight for, maybe leaving is not the worst thing you can do; it’s scary as fuck, but not that bad in the long run. Save your money, make your plans, and be open and honest with your partner when the time comes.

I wanted to take a moment to offer a different perspective. It sounds like your friend is disassociating. That doesn’t make him a bad dad. It just means he might be dealing with things that he is trying to protect himself from on an emotional level. I won’t try to conjecture what they are, because I don’t know him nor do I know his situation. And if you’re willing to take my advice, I’d suggest giving him the benefit of the doubt and just being there for him; whatever that may look like. You might even try to ask him about it (but be willing to accept that if there is something going on, he may not be ready or willing to talk about it).

Good luck to your friend.

Here’s how I approach old and slow:

1. Older software is mature and battle tested. It’s been around long enough that the developers should know what they’re doing, and have built a strong community for help and support.
2. Slow is okay when it comes to accuracy. Would I love to back up my gigabytes (peanuts compared to some of you folks out there with data centers in your attics) in seconds? Yes. But more importantly, I’d rather have my data be valid for if I ever need to do any kind of restore. And I’ve been around the block enough times in my career to see many useless backups.

You’re welcome?

If you haven’t already, and if a show like this might interest you, you should watch Supernatural. It is 15 seasons long, and I won’t spoil it for you, but let’s just say that song is a staple of the entire series. And aptly so.

And even if you don’t like that song, the show is worth it regardless.

~No spoilers, but they do an entire episode as characters in Scooby Doo.~