Does this motherfucker just go on disinformation tours, with shows in every country?

Ok, but why are they in a room in Russia?

I’m…not sure you’re reading that headline right, Bub.

Wait, no I’m sorry, it’s me who misread it.

Depends, do you need 37 of them?

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Oh, well thats nice of them, I guess. Who is Mexico attacking?

So right under a story about a Martian bat/human hybrid born from a ghost?

Lol, my parents for some completely out of character reason I’ll never understand took me to see Gremlins 2 when I was 8. This was not a request from me, Im pretty sure I had never heard of Grenlins before. I loved it, but I’m not sure it didn’t traumatize me.

Yeah, Spielberg is a genius, but that wasn’t his best work.

Aliens is the James Cameron sequel which is a bit more action than horror. Did you mean Alien or Aliens?

Im not even sure how many times I’ve watched First Contact. One of my favorite episodes is the one where Worf devolves into an actual werewolf.

Wilson!

So…yeah, I was watching Tales from the Crypt when I was like 9.

Yeah, now imagine being an American jew who’s been told their whole life Israel is their true homeland.

Nah, they could fatwa his fat ass all the same, regardless.

We will read the headline, and possibly every single word in it. Like 75% of the time, at least.

Yes, 3 fish hooks for dinner, excellent suggestion.

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Oh man, I’m jealous you get to hear it all at once. It’s only been a couple days.

…yeah? I mean, they’re at war, no? That’s kind of how wars work.

Boxer receives double jab and uppercut. Announces he will strike back.