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Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: August 27th, 2023

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  • Well I try to stay away from any work relations personally. It sounds like he’s innocent about it more than anything. People usually don’t share that info specifically because of situations like this. I think it’s fine to go for it if you properly like her. I’d ask her to keep it out of work and keep it as a kind of secret relationship at least for the beginning, but he’ll hate you even more for it when he does find out.

    It kind of sounds like he’s got puppy dog love going on. I only know a bit about the situation but I feel like she isn’t going to jump in his arms the moment you back off or something. I definitely wouldn’t feel bad about it.

    There’s other things to think about. Are you technically her boss too? That might affect the office gossip.






  • Your stats about hate crimes (102 anti-trans hate crimes in a city of 3.9 million) don’t amount to much when taking into account the 3/4 of the middle east that encourages them, and their hate crimes usually end up in a hate mob hate burning someone to death.

    She was also frightened the person was going to run her over, there is never a clear mention of an attempt. You can’t compare that to Sudan and their civil war for example.

    Idk, when I hear refugee, fleeing the country comes to mind and there’s a clear danger. I just don’t see it at this time. Like, there’s a problem but there’s also trans hotlines and help groups, resources and ways to escape inside the country from even the worst of places. There’s no gay hotline in Iran. There’s no “I snitched on the cartels” help groups in Mexico. We are talking about vastly different worlds and dangers here.



  • It’s not that you’re less dead, it’s that there are less chance of it happening in San Fransisco than in Saudi Arabia. Stop twisting my words please.

    Same for your PS. I never said only. It does augment the chances of it happening if it’s your government thought, since you would be handed to them. Most gangs are deeply embedded in the government in Latin America, I would say it’s essentially the same.

    It isn’t black and white and these things do need to be taken into account. Right now, it sounds like your are saying sending this person back to SF and sending the person next to them back to Saudi Arabia are the same.

    It sucks that we have to pick who deserves to have asylum. Its a shitty system but how likely that person is to die or worse if they go back should definitely be part of the thought process.




  • Well I do have a problem with worldwide quotas and immigration in general, I wish our borders were much more open. Look, I’m just saying that someone from San Fransisco probably has other options available and shouldn’t lean on a system that’s already strained. There’s genocides and civil wars going on. Being gay is a death sentence in 8 countries. A lot of displaced women and girls have asylum or sex trade as a choice, they simply don’t have options.

    I don’t think it’s wrong to say we need to triage and prioritize certain problems because of lack of resources. It doesn’t mean the ones not chosen don’t exist or that the whole system shouldn’t have more resources.